Drowning in life

So life has been busy in the past 6+ months since my last update. Dan’s been working hard, really hard, in Baghdad. We got to see him for American Thanksgiving in Tucson. I had a wonderful Christmas with all of my siblings in Kelowna. Eva turned 1! Daniel came to visit for his 2nd R&R and just left on Thursday. I’ve been taking classes in non-profit management. I volunteer as the vice president for IWEN. The world spins ‘round.

This single parent thing is hard, harder than I expected. I have such enormous respect for those who do it truly alone, without the end date I am so looking forward to. I get much less sleep now than I used to, the house is much messier and my patience tends to run a little thinner. BUT, I am growing. I am stronger, more capable than I used to be. My patience and tolerance is growing and it is pulled and stretched daily.

I am loving and embracing the moments. I see them everywhere. Yesterday as Emilie turned and asked me what would make me smile and after I told her that she should sing and dance she proceeded to sing at the top of her lungs and twirl around the coffee table. Eva, quietly thinking and figuring it ALL out. The girls run up to me with books in their hands and both snuggle up on my lap at the same time while I read. Emilie running her hands down my cheeks and telling me I am beautiful and her best friend. Eva holding my finger while she drinks her bottle. The girls laughing together as they play.

It is easy for me to focus on the negative, and, to be honest, I often do. I vent and complain to Dan if, for no other reason, because I need to get it off my chest. But, my life is so wonderful and holds beauty not yet revealed.

I constantly feel like I am drowning in things not done, in frustrations in disappointments and sadness yet, I am also drowning in laughter, in fun, in simple joys. I am drowning in life and may it always be so.

~Katie